Questions and Answers about the Swinger Lifestyle

What is Swinging?

 Swinging is social and sexual intercourse with someone other than your mate, boyfriend or girlfriend, excepting the traditional one-on-one dating. It may be defined as recreational social sex. The activity may occur at a swing party, a couple-to-couple encounter, a liason, or with a third person in a threesome. Though single men and women are involved, it is primarily an activity of couples. 

   Swinging is having sexual activity with someone else other than your spouse/mate, with the your spouse/mates approval. If you’re having sex with someone other than your spouse/mate, without your spouse/mate’s approval, you’re not swinging, your cheating, swinging is just having sex with someone else with your spouses/mates approval and in most cases in attendance. 

Who the Swingers Are

People who swing come from all economic levels. Every job classification, all races and nationalities are represented, though the majority are Caucasian, middle to upper middle socio-economic class, and married. Swingers, married and single, tend to be adventuresome, emotionally mature, and have excellent relationships with their mates and friends. Single people are involved in swinging but not to the extent of couples. Many single women have joined swing clubs, finding them a refreshing alternative to the traditional bar scene. 

Couples in Swinging

 Swinging is "the recreation" for couples whether they are married, committed (having an ongoing emotional commitment), living together (co-habitating, with or without an on-going intimate relationship) or single couples who date. A study of swinging couples (McGinley, 1979) reported increased enjoyment and satisfaction in the relationships accompanied by a better understanding of self and mate, greater intimacy between the partners and a decrease in sex role playing and sexist expectations.

Swinging enables a couple to explore sexual and social feelings and needs together, permitting a demystification of sex which allows sex to assume a place in the relationship unhindered by the standard ties to love, duty, sex roles and morals of others.

 Women in Swinging

  It is certainly an understatement to say that the role of women in our society has greatly changed over the past several decades. The humanistic and woman’s movements have had an impact on sexuality also. The number of women choosing involvement in swinging during the past few years is remarkable. Sexual and social assertiveness on the part of women at swing parties and other swing activities is not only acceptable, it has come to be expected.

To openly be oneself without fear of seeming unfeminine is a delightful experience for a woman and a welcome experience for the man. Swinging provides the environment to alter sex-role playing for both sexes, allowing men and women to participate with each other in a uniquely human experience.

Men in Swinging

 Whether married, in a relationship or single, swinging can be a wonderful experience for a man. Not surprisingly, most women who are into swinging were introduced to the lifestyle by a man in their life. Also not surprising, many men would swing if only they could. They are hindered from the experience by their marriage, or if single, their inability to find a woman for a swinging partner. Of course, guilt feelings about sex and pleasure, and sex roles, also hinder men from swinging.

Men are not the macho, always ready, self-reliant persons of fiction. They are as human as their female counterparts. They experience loneliness and fear rejection. A man, on convincing his wife to try swinging, may experience unexpected jealousy and a feeling of loss when she walks hand in hand, partially nude and obviously excited, toward a bedroom with another towel-clad man. He had fantasized himself in swinging but had not comprehended the reality of his wife or mate swinging.

As with women, the experience of swinging can be growth producing for a man. It alters forever traditional concepts of man-woman relationships with sexist overtones. Through swinging, a man can experience a great deal of pleasure.

What is a Swing Club or Private Party House?

NASCA defines swing clubs as any organization, formal or informal, which exists to provide swinging activities. Swing clubs exist in a variety of forms. These include Swing Clubs, Party Houses, Circles and Socials, Bars and Cocktail Lounges and Contact Services. All but the contact services may be on-premises or off-premises. Contact services work through the mail or telephone and rarely provide swing parties although they may promote group travel. Parties given by on-premises swing clubs may have from ten to sixty or more couples, though twenty to forty couples is the common average. On-premises means that sexual activity occurs at the party. Off premises swing clubs, cocktail lounges and bars help you to meet other swingers. Swinging will be elsewhere with the interested couples and singles responsible for the arrangements. The arrangements include who is to be invited, the location, date and time.

The on premises party offers a wide possibility of social interaction, selection, potential of swinging with others in a foursome, threesome, one-on-one, or in a group scene. Bisexual as well as heterosexual swinging is possible, principally among women. And the club on-premises party offers this without pressure in a structured environment. Private, semi-private and group rooms are generally provided to meet the desires of virtually everyone. Heated pools, Jacuzzi’s and hot tubs may be available to accent the social environment.

What is Sex in Swinging Like?

 The actual sexual activity of swinging is varied. Though important, swinging is rarely centered around the orgasm but on the various pleasurable acts that lead to orgasm. Once on a bed, the participants will generally begin with kissing and caressing each other’s body. Both the woman’s and man’s nipples are favorite places of fondling, sucking and gentle nibbling, followed by licking and kissing around the genital area, then the genitals directly. Most develop techniques they feel pleasure their various partners.

Sixty-nine or mutual oral-genital pleasuring is popular. Either partner may masturbate the other, and vibrators may be employed, especially in group swing scenes such as in the swing club’s group room. These activities may be intermixed with intercourse done in a variety of ways. Anal sex is popular with some swingers. Bisexual swinging is more common among women than among men.